GENESIS 2:18 "It is not good for man to be alone."

I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.

Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.

The waves beside them danced; but they
Out-did the sparkling waves in glee:
A poet could not but be gay,
In such a jocund company:
I gazed---and gazed---but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:

For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils.

William Wordsworth

Wordsworth suffered no mental pain or unhappiness from being alone. For him, it was the passageway to companionship, through communion with nature. And being a devout man, he was often touched by grace while he wandered, and his vision was imbued with Love and Understanding as he saw traces of divinity and intimations of immortality all around. And even when he wandered "lonely as a cloud,"... "loneliness" was never a problem.

"Loneliness" is defined in the dictionary as the state of "unhappiness" as a result of being without the "companionship" of others. And there are two kinds of loneliness. One is a profound, existential loneliness that comes from being without the companionship of God. This is the fundamental source of loneliness for all of mankind, and we address it below. The other is the loneliness for human companionship, for which there are many magazines, books, and avenues of self-help available. Through natural efforts, and according to the dictates of our vocation and common sense, we can usually take steps to remedy this latter situation.

The root cause of our loneliness is Original Sin. For due to this sin, we are born into the world without the spiritual companionship, and union with the Person of the Divine Spirit, for which we were created. And so we desperately spend our lives in unending pursuit of all sorts of company and companionship from our fellows, and in the acquisition of excessive and imroper amounts of food, sex, and physical pleasures, to fill our painful sense of lonely emptiness and isolation.

And no matter how hard we try, we find that other people and created possessions do not fill this basic emptiness, for it can only be filled by union with God. And this includes our partner in marriage. Frequently, they just make it more intense, as we realize they are not the remedy for our problem. And as we get older, and our loved ones and friends depart from us, and we find greater and greater isolation, our loneliness becomes increasingly painful. And since some of us in this situation have lived our lives with the natural selfishness inherited from Original Sin, and without seeking the very real, ongoing companionship of the Sacred Humanity of Jesus Christ, we find that even our close friends and relatives do not want our unhappy company, nor to listen to our litany of complaints.

And yet, Almighty God has entered history and told us there is a better way:

"The son of God came into the world," adds Fray Angeles, "for the joy of the world; He came anoointed as to a wedding feast; He came to dispel melancholy and sorrow from the hearts of men, who knew only how to weep and grieve. St Paul said (Rom 14,12) that "the kingdom of God means righteousness and peace and joy brought by the Holy Spirit." As we know, St Paul was celibate and single. Although he enjoyed the company of others, he didn't depend on it. The real basis of his joy was his intimate union with Almighty God.

For the spiritual life is a life lived in imitation of Christ. The characteristics of His Spirit are to become the characteristics of our spirit. Being alone in solitude, or maintaining a spiritual solitude while living with others, is a significant part of our spiritual walk. Loneliness, and the painful need for others, must one day give way to "the one thing necessary:" spiritual union with God in detachment from the need for other creatures. There is no loneliness in this, only the solitude characteristic of true lovers.

"And so a continual solitude enveloped Jesus. There were always men about him, but among them he was alone."(Romano Guardini, "The Humanity of Christ")

Bishop Robert Hugh Benson has some important thoughts in regard to the loneliness of all of us who have neglected to develop a close friendship with the Person and Sacred Humanity of the One Who gave His Life for us:

"On the other hand, he was reserved towards men, even towards his closest friends. He always remained peculiarly detached. John says: "Jesus would not give them his confidence; he had knowledge of them all, and did not need assurances about any man, because he could read men's hearts" (John 2. 24-5). He wanted nothing from men. Between him and men there was no community of mutual interests, not even one of common work. We never find him portrayed attempting to clarify an issue in common with his companions, or seeking with them a way to become master of some situation. We do not even find him working together with them. Apart from occasions devoted to common worship, like the Paschal meal, he is never even seen praying with them. And the only time he did look for comfort of human companionship, he did not find it: "Could you not watch one hour with me?" (Mat. 26. 40).(Ibid)

. But since this way of Christian Companionship requires consistent recollection and whole-hearted commitment to the First Commandment, with the moritification of all secondary affections, we want no part of it. And yet, there are Christian hermits, and monastic contemplatives, far more isolated than Wordsworth in his lonely wandering, that spend their lives in physical poverty and without the company of others, and who, nevertheless, rarely suffer the pain of lonliness. And these recluses and hermits, like the Desert Fathers, Richard Rolle, Julian of Norwich, St Anthony of the Desert, and thousands of others in private homes, monasteries and hermitages at the present time, and down through the centuries, find peace and Divine Presence without the very companionship and possessions that those lonely souls imbued with the standards of the world seem to think absolutely necessary. And these "not so lonely" recluses, like David in the Psalms, rise early to enjoy the opportunity to be alone with the Divine Spouse!

How do we explain it? Could it be that we are not just natural, evolutionary organisms, and that there really is a God who loves us, and whose companionship will satisfy all our longings? Is it possible that His Indwelling Spirit really abides in such reclusive Christian souls as He promised, and makes them happy? Of course, our action-oriented society can't deal with such an un-scientific answer. For, they say, statistics have conclusively proven we were created by evolution so we could be happy, forever, "practicing science." So our conemporaries, instead of recognizing the obvious, like well-trained worshipers of science should, say that all such hermits and isolated individuals must be mad! For they are not like us, and don't fit the norm. All such religious prattlers should be on Freud's couch, or in Jung's psychic cocoon, or perhaps in communist mental hospitals, so that comrade doctor can give them injections! And then, they can be "normal," and "happy" proletarians like the rest of us.

But in spite of the prevalence of moral sickness in our postmodern world, and its determination to drug or destroy itself rather than suffer the psychic pain that comes with Godlessness, and its accompanying gift of loneliness, there is Good News! It is not too late to restore our souls through the relationship for which we were created, in the Love of our Good Friend and the Companion of our souls, Jesus Christ. For when we seek Him, and the Friendship that will forever allay our sickness and heal our loneliness, we find that He has all the while been seeking us!

St Augustine said, "I did not find You without Lord, because I wrongly sought You without, Who were within." And St. Augustine, a bishop, was a busy person like you, yet he managed to find ongoing time for God "within."

St John of the Cross advises you: "Oh, then, soul, most beautiful among all the creatures, so anxious to know the dwelling place of your Beloved that you may go in quest of Him and be united with Him... This is something of immense gladness for you, to see that all your good and hope is so close to you...What more do you want, O soul. And what else do you search for outside when within yourself you possess your riches, delights, satisfactions, fullness and kingdom, your Beloved Whom you desire and seek? Desire Him there, adore Him there. Do not go in pursuit of Him outside yourself. You will only become distracted and wearied thereby."

Know that God loves you very much. He wants you to turn from loneliness and despair and give your heart to the One Who died for you and Who keeps His promises. You do this by staying in the Presence of Almighty God throughout the day's activities by silently repeating the Jesus Prayer to yourself, "Jesus have mercy." And if we are married, we must not be afraid of giving our hearts to God in order to keep our marital relationship in the right priority. For if we place God first in our lives, then with His strength our marriage has a chance of surviving, and even blossoming in the grace of God, no matter how the partner responds.

Let us begin to stay recollected and in the Presence of our True Companion, Jesus, throughout our many activities all day long. Let us share our Life with Him through ongoing conversation and gratitude for what He has done for us. And as the days and months turn into years, and as winter spreads her hoary mantle all around, we shall retain vigor and joy in our spirits, even when our bodies fail, our friends depart, and we find ourselves alone. And we shall not be lonely. For we shall be filled with the joy of the Supernatural Spirit, "alone with the Alone." And we must do this, no matter what our vocation may be, or whether our vocation changes, or we move from one vocation to another in response to God's call. For we are all called to perfection and sanctity. And this translates into a close loving relationship with the Person and Humanity of Our Blessed Lord.

"Catholics then, above all others, are prone--through their very knowledge of the mysteries of faith, through their very apprehension of Jesus Christ as their God, their High Priest, their Victim, their Prophet and their King--to forget that His delights are to be with the sons of men more than to rule the Seraphim, that, while His Majesty held Him on the throne of His Father, His Love brought Him down on pilgrimage that He might transform His servants into His friends. For example, devout souls often complain of their loneliness on earth. They pray, they frequent the sacraments, they do their utmost to fulfil the Christian precepts; and, when all is done, they find themselves solitary. There could scarcely be a more evident proof of their failure to understand one at least of the great motives of the Incarnation. They adore Christ as God, they feed on Him in Communion, cleanse themselves in His precious Blood, look to the time when they shall see Him as their Judge; yet of that intimate knowledge of and companionship with Him in which the Divine Friendship consists, they have experienced little or nothing. They long, they say, for one who can not merely remove suffering, but can himself suffer with them, one to whom they can express in silence the thoughts which no speech can utter; and they seem not to understand that this is the very post which Jesus Christ Himself desires to win, that the supreme longing of His Sacred Heart is that He should be admitted, not merely to the throne of the heart or to the tribunal of conscience, but to that inner secret chamber of the soul where a man is most himself, and therefore most utterly alone."(The Friendship of Christ, by Bishop Robert Hugh Benson)

And in the wonder of that Divine Companionship with the Word Made Flesh, Jesus Christ, we shall find, like the legions who have gone before us, that our youth shall be renewed like the eagle, and our spirits shall ever rejoice in the Living God! For "then your light shall rise in the darkness and your gloom be like the noonday. The Lord will guide you continually, and satisfy your needs in parched places, and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters never fail."(Isaiah 58)

HER GRIEF TRANSFORMED
by Andrew Richards

Alone I sat, alone in grief,
A lonely heart, I had no hope,
Filled with pain, with no relief,
With such fear, I could not cope,
Half my life had ripped away,
When death took him from me that day.

I saw a neighbor's smiling face,
Wondering how it came to be,
To me such smiles seemed a disgrace,
In view of death's reality,
I turned away from laughing eyes,
Refusing joy when everyone dies.

Seeing friends busy with life,
Made me sick with hidden disdain,
Unaware, that death's bitter strife,
Would suddenly find them, certain as rain,
For life is only flesh and blood,
And soon enough we're dust and mud.

Cut off from the love on which I did lean,
As my weeping filled the solitude,
I was near despair at a life so mean,
Oh where is the one to lighten my mood.
Oh what is the use, I cannot go on,
Nothing has purpose, all hope is gone.

I started to quake, in sobbing and aching,
Remembering the face stolen from me,
Then panic began, and my body was shaking,
As I thought of the life without him, to be,
Then all of a sudden, a light grew inside me,
And an imageless vision, I started to see.

My panic did stop as I felt a Great Power,
And the Presence of Jesus I suddenly knew,
His Voice in my mind, in that sad hour,
Filled me with courage, and joy ever new,
His Words were life to a spirit dying,
His "Be not afraid!" ended my crying.

I have kept this secret to the present day,
For none would believe the heavenly power,
That turned grief to joy in a wonderful way,
And that changed my life from that very hour,
For years have passed since that heavenly sight,
And today I am married to His Spirit of Light.

End